2011年4月13日 星期三

Descriping a person

  When my good friend and I took a trip to Tokyo Dome in Japan, she was missing.  With the descriptions of her appearance below, I hope everyone could help me find her as soon as possible.  The name of my friend, Kayla, who has black straight long hair,dressed in a yellow T- shirt, pink miniskirt and a pair of red shoes when I last saw her.  She wears glasses and has a sweet smile on her face all the time.  And the color her eyes is deep brown.  That's the color of Taiwanese people's eyes.  Besides, she is medium height and slender.  Please call this number if anyone find her. 0911001101.  I will appreciate your favor.
張貼者： 於

7 則留言:

  1. 珍儀2011年4月20日 晚上11:35

    為什麼我要在日本走失?!! 抗議!!

    The name of my friend, Kayla, who has black straight long hair,dressed in a yellow T- shirt, pink miniskirt and a pair of red shoes when I last saw her.
    The name of my friend, Kayla,
    這兩個順序互換比較正常

    And the color her eyes is deep brown.
    沒有of

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  2. 靖苡2011年4月20日 晚上11:50

    第二行的could不用過去式吧~

    倒數四→And her eyes'the color is deep brown.

    →Please call my if you find her and my number is 0911001101.



    內容很順~

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  3. 玲儀2011年4月20日 晚上11:53

    who has black straight long hair,dressed in a yellow T- shirt,
    時態要一致喔
    who had black straight long hair,dressesd in a
    yellow T-shirt,

    She wears glasses and has a sweet smile on her face all the time.
    時態應該要一樣吧
    She weard glasses and had a sweet smile on her
    face all the time.

    And the color her eyes is deep brown
    -And the color her eyes was deep brown

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  4. 椿茱2011年4月22日 上午8:38

    The name of my friend, Kayla
    →My friend named Kayla

    and has a sweet smile on her face all the time.
    →and always keep a sweet smile on her face ~

    And the color her eyes
    →And the color of her eyes

    deep brown. That's the color of Taiwanese people's eyes.
    → deep brown, which is the color Taiwanese's eyes.

    Please call this number if anyone find her. 0911001101.

    Please call this number 0911001101, if you find her.

    其他都不錯呢:D

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  5. 爾雅2011年4月27日 上午8:40

    倒數第三行 And the color her eyes is deep brown
    color後面應該要再加of吧

    其他的好順喔~

    是說你跟Kayla一個寫日本 一個寫韓國XDDDD

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  6. 曉芸2011年4月27日 晚上10:41

    when I last saw her. =>我覺得改這樣較好喔~when the last time I saw her.

    And the color her eyes is deep brown.=>要加of喔=ˇ=
    其他的我覺得都還滿順的喔~

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  7. 惠芳2011年4月27日 晚上11:24

    And the color her eyes is deep brown.
    and放句首會比較不好看...
    可以用moreover或in addition代替~
    開頭有一點短...
    可以加多一點詳細的敘述~
    例如為省摸去巨蛋或是因為怎樣而走失的!!!
    篇幅˙就會看起來更豐富喔=)

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